So, last night I visit my children at their father's home. If you've read the other stuff I've written, you know that I am going through a custody battle because my children are failing school.
The situation is crappy, and I don't wish it on ANYONE - not even their father.
The bomb went off when my oldest, he's 16, told me that he wants to fail this year. HE'S A JUNIOR IN HIGH SCHOOL!!! He said he wants to fail so he can graduate with some of his other friends a year behind him. Then he told me that he's going to be honest with the judge when we go to court (currently scheduled for April 9) and tell him that he wants to live with his dad. Now, you have to understand, this is the kid that has ALWAYS said he didn't want to choose. Me thinks me smells a RAT!!!
Then my youngest, he's 13, says the same thing.
Here's what I think is going on:
Dad moans and groans in the presence of the children that if they have to live with me, he will lose everything. He won't be able to pay his bills, etc., because he will lose his little (HUGE) monthly paycheck that we non-custodial parents are forced to call child support. That money NEVER goes to my children. My ex-mother in law and I buy their clothes, shoes, etc.
Anyway, I think they thought I would say "I'm sorry" and drop the case. WRONG! I told them that if they want to stay with dad, they have from now until court to bring up those failing grades. I also told them that I will wait to hear the judge's verdict. I want the judge to say yea or nay.
Can you tell I'm a little peeved?
So, what did I do when I got home last night? What any mother would do - CRIED! Then I prayed. I prayed for God to change me...change my heart. I want God's will to be done in my life. Also, I don't want anyone to EVER say that I didn't try.
So, what am I doing today? Baby, I'm praying, of course.
I'll blog some more soon.....
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Another Great One-Liner
Just got this little thing from one of my email buddies, and had to share it with all of you:
God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close.
That's great, isn't it? I mean, we knew that, but to see it on the page...Man!
God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close.
That's great, isn't it? I mean, we knew that, but to see it on the page...Man!
BUMMER!!! My ramblings about court!
Have you ever had something that you just prayed and prayed over, but kept hanging on to it? Even though you'd given it to God? Well, I recently had one of those moments, and I am beginning to think that I have let it eat at me until I have a sore stomach.
On Friday, the 23rd of January, I found out that my custody hearing had been cancelled for tomorrow, 2/4/09. Of course, I wasn't guaranteed that spot, because there was someone else on the docket in front of my case. It was what's called "second-out". Second in line. If the person in front of me had settled out of court, my case would have been heard tomorrow.
I cannot express just how heart-broken I was that day. Even now, almost 2 weeks later, my heart literally aches to think about it. My new court date is April 9. My first instinct is to scream. Find a room and scream. What am I doing this for? Am I simply torturing myself to care so much that my kids fail school? Maybe they need to learn the hard way....
But in the stillness, in the quiet, I remember words from a dear friend, "God has a reason for this, and it's meant to be". Now, is it always easy to hear words such as this when my stomach hurts and I have cried 'til my tears just can't come anymore? No, but I know GOD has a plan for my life, much greater than I could ever imagine. IF I stay truthful to HIM. It's MUCH bigger than whether the kids are awarded to me, and whether they EVER learn to stand up and be men. It's so much more than that.
It's all gonna be okay. One way or the other. I miss my babies so much sometimes. Guess what? They would be upset with me if they knew I called them babies again.
I'll stop rambling for now...
Stay BLESSED! I know I am!
On Friday, the 23rd of January, I found out that my custody hearing had been cancelled for tomorrow, 2/4/09. Of course, I wasn't guaranteed that spot, because there was someone else on the docket in front of my case. It was what's called "second-out". Second in line. If the person in front of me had settled out of court, my case would have been heard tomorrow.
I cannot express just how heart-broken I was that day. Even now, almost 2 weeks later, my heart literally aches to think about it. My new court date is April 9. My first instinct is to scream. Find a room and scream. What am I doing this for? Am I simply torturing myself to care so much that my kids fail school? Maybe they need to learn the hard way....
But in the stillness, in the quiet, I remember words from a dear friend, "God has a reason for this, and it's meant to be". Now, is it always easy to hear words such as this when my stomach hurts and I have cried 'til my tears just can't come anymore? No, but I know GOD has a plan for my life, much greater than I could ever imagine. IF I stay truthful to HIM. It's MUCH bigger than whether the kids are awarded to me, and whether they EVER learn to stand up and be men. It's so much more than that.
It's all gonna be okay. One way or the other. I miss my babies so much sometimes. Guess what? They would be upset with me if they knew I called them babies again.
I'll stop rambling for now...
Stay BLESSED! I know I am!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Uplifting Quotes
In my daily emails, etc., with my buddies, I have collected a number of quotes or thoughts. I always make sure that those I keep are uplifting and something that will make me think...so, here goes....Remember, I didn't write these; simply collected them from the many emails I've received....
1. Don't tell God about your storm; tell the storm about your God!
2. Doing what is best for you will never harm another person - I HAD TO THINK ABOUT THIS ONE REALLY HARD!!!
3. To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.
4. The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.
5. If You Need Help, ask God. If You Don't, Thank God.
6. A Strong Spirit focuses on the Possibilities of Life...but a Weak Spirit focuses on Problems of Life.
7. What really matters is what happens in us, not to us.
8. People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful you will win some false friend and true enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you; be honest anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway- Mother Teresa.
9. Happiness keeps You Sweet, Trials keep You Strong, Sorrows keep You Human, Failures keep You Humble, Success keeps You Glowing, But Only God keeps You Going!
Hope you find as much joy in these as I have. Stay blessed!
1. Don't tell God about your storm; tell the storm about your God!
2. Doing what is best for you will never harm another person - I HAD TO THINK ABOUT THIS ONE REALLY HARD!!!
3. To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.
4. The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.
5. If You Need Help, ask God. If You Don't, Thank God.
6. A Strong Spirit focuses on the Possibilities of Life...but a Weak Spirit focuses on Problems of Life.
7. What really matters is what happens in us, not to us.
8. People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful you will win some false friend and true enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you; be honest anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway- Mother Teresa.
9. Happiness keeps You Sweet, Trials keep You Strong, Sorrows keep You Human, Failures keep You Humble, Success keeps You Glowing, But Only God keeps You Going!
Hope you find as much joy in these as I have. Stay blessed!
Friday, January 16, 2009
The Cell Phone Technology
I love my phone! I didn't know how much until the battery was lost last night after I got off work at my night job. My phone fell out of my purse and hit the tile floor of the break room. I found the phone and the back of the phone, but the battery was NOWHERE to be found. 6 co-workers and I crawled on our hands and knees....even pulled out the refrigerators, etc., and it just vanished.
When I left work I went by one of the "Super WalMart" stores - by now it's close to 10 pm. I'm thinking WalMart has EVERYTHING, right? WRONG! Even though they process sales for cell phone programs, they do not carry "accessories" such as a battery.
I felt SO inept without my phone!
To make matters worse, I went to the AT&T super-duper store today just to buy a battery. Guess what? Since I've had my phone SOOO LONG (really, only 2 years), it's been discontinued. Which means what? They no longer carry those batteries. But guess what? They were ready to sell me another phone, and of course, I had to get it because I couldn't get the stuff needed to make the old one work!!!!
I've lost some of my contact info, as well as the pictures of my favorite place. At least I'm back up and running.
Technology is great as long as the user is not a bone-head....I am SOOO technologically challenged!
When I left work I went by one of the "Super WalMart" stores - by now it's close to 10 pm. I'm thinking WalMart has EVERYTHING, right? WRONG! Even though they process sales for cell phone programs, they do not carry "accessories" such as a battery.
I felt SO inept without my phone!
To make matters worse, I went to the AT&T super-duper store today just to buy a battery. Guess what? Since I've had my phone SOOO LONG (really, only 2 years), it's been discontinued. Which means what? They no longer carry those batteries. But guess what? They were ready to sell me another phone, and of course, I had to get it because I couldn't get the stuff needed to make the old one work!!!!
I've lost some of my contact info, as well as the pictures of my favorite place. At least I'm back up and running.
Technology is great as long as the user is not a bone-head....I am SOOO technologically challenged!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Concentrate
Concentrate on this Sentence
'To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.' When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better..
Concentrate on this sentence... 'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'
'To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.' When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better..
Concentrate on this sentence... 'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'
Just a Little Closer
For those of you who've never been through a D-I-V-O-R-C-E or a C-U-S-T-O-D-Y B-A-T-T-L-E, let me give a little insight. Of course, I previously mentioned that my 2nd big "D" was finalized last year. And, I mentioned that I am fighting for custody with ex-hubby #1.
These processes can be long and drawn out...
As we move closer to the court date, documents must be completed in a process called "discovery". Some attorneys may not call it that - only the good ones usually use that word. Others will say "answer these interrogatories and send them to me". What they mean is - the opposing party has questions that they want answered about your lifestyle, time spent with kids, etc. In turn, your attorney will make the opposing party answer questions as well. It's all about gathering data.
Intellectually, I understand and comprehend this need. Emotionally, however, I have a hard time with it because they (#1 & his attorney) can get pretty personal. Of course, my attorney does, too. I have NOTHING to hide. However, these situations make one second-guess themselves.
The sad thing is this: It couldn't be worked out amicably so it came to this. I actually feel bad sometimes because I didn't want it to be this way. #1 and I worked very hard to come to terms with past issues for 5 years, and we did a good job for a while. But the truth is, it worked fine as long as I did the legwork. This brain of mine finally said "WAKE UP" one day.
I am not a spineless or weak woman. However, there are those times, such as yesterday completing the questions and financial information, that I have a bad day. So, what did I do? I finally remembered that Daddy God has this handled. I may not like the outcome of this situation, but he's gonna take care of it. I prayed over it last night and this morning. It's gonna be okay - whatever the judge may decide - Daddy God is in control.
These processes can be long and drawn out...
As we move closer to the court date, documents must be completed in a process called "discovery". Some attorneys may not call it that - only the good ones usually use that word. Others will say "answer these interrogatories and send them to me". What they mean is - the opposing party has questions that they want answered about your lifestyle, time spent with kids, etc. In turn, your attorney will make the opposing party answer questions as well. It's all about gathering data.
Intellectually, I understand and comprehend this need. Emotionally, however, I have a hard time with it because they (#1 & his attorney) can get pretty personal. Of course, my attorney does, too. I have NOTHING to hide. However, these situations make one second-guess themselves.
The sad thing is this: It couldn't be worked out amicably so it came to this. I actually feel bad sometimes because I didn't want it to be this way. #1 and I worked very hard to come to terms with past issues for 5 years, and we did a good job for a while. But the truth is, it worked fine as long as I did the legwork. This brain of mine finally said "WAKE UP" one day.
I am not a spineless or weak woman. However, there are those times, such as yesterday completing the questions and financial information, that I have a bad day. So, what did I do? I finally remembered that Daddy God has this handled. I may not like the outcome of this situation, but he's gonna take care of it. I prayed over it last night and this morning. It's gonna be okay - whatever the judge may decide - Daddy God is in control.
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